I’ll be honest. This has no literary merit whatsoever, but I need to vent. I’m ready to see this giraffe baby! I’ve grown attached to the pacing mama, watched as little hooves stretch out her belly, and awed as her much younger mate dotes on her. I need a status update. Can we not get a dilation approximation? I wonder if giraffes are measured in inches.
I do not plan on sharing the amount of time I have kept the live stream going in the background. I do not plan on sharing the amount of time spent conversing about this giraffe. I do not plan on sharing the names I’ve brainstormed for April’s baby. No, I am not ashamed that I refer to her in conversation. By name. And everyone knows who I am talking about.
Nor will I admit that I laughed out loud for five solid minutes when I saw the pregnant woman with the photoshopped giraffe head pacing in her bedroom.